Entries by Mike

It has been an interesting past 5 days. I have had Vanessa over to my place once this week yesterday. I can barely walk today and work is just dragging by which is why I decided to write this blog entry now when really I should be working, but hey I don't get paid enough anyways so who cares. I have access to the log files and I always delete everything I do. In most companies they keep track of all the websites you visit and everything you type. If I wasn't the admin here I would never do this but I am so yay me. I have never been used for sex before but it feels great. I feel like I am on cloud nine. I have spent many hours and weekends going to various different seminars about self improvement and habit building things etc and it is amazing how I can feel more confident, happy, and satisfied from one night of sex than I can from years of that other bullshit. It is amazing how much positive effect sex has on the human condition.

I have been chatting with a few 35+ year old women and things are going well. I am still talking to a few horny young freaks also. I have been chatting with this one girl named Kerri who is only 21 years old and she is a sexual freak! She is always masturbating in front of me on her webcam and I am like wtf. She thinks that older men are sexy and she wants to get together with me sometime this week and I do not mean to go on a date. She said just come over here and do whatever you want to me! Seriously, I feel like I have won the lottery or something. I am actually kind of worried that something major negative is going to happen to me because I have had such good fortune lately. Another part of me tells me that I deserve it and that it has all been the result of hard work finally paying off and I shouldn't worry about something bad happening.

Hi all let me bring you up to speed. I had Kilana over to my place a couple of weeks ago and we ended up having sex but it was like the worst sex I have ever had with a woman and I just don't think we are sexually compatible. I am not going to get into graphic details or anything but let's just say she seemed like a real noobie with a chip on her shoulder. Things just did not go smooth and she didn't really seem too passionate etc. Anyways moving on.

I also had a girl named Vanessa over to my place who is only 27... yeah that's right this 43 yr old dude was able to score with a 27 year old. Feels pretty good for my ego. The sex was amazing and I haven't felt like that in 15+ years. The only problem is that there is no way we are compatible to have a relationship and we both know it. The cool part is she doesn't care and says she can just use me for sex! Ok, fine by me, use me all you want omg are you kidding. When I tell my buddies about this, they just can't believe it. They are married to women they can't stand and they barely have sex anymore. I feel so rejuvenated that I joined a gym last week and I have been doing cardio and lifting weights ever since. This girl has renewed my faith in myself and I will be forever grateful to her for that regardless of what happens with her.

So life is good and I can't complain. What I have been doing lately though is trying to focus my attention on women that will be suitable to be in relationships with. I figure I can't really go below 35 otherwise the girl will just be too young and it won't work so I have sent off a bunch of messages to women that are 35 and older and there is definitely some hot ones here in Austin. I have to be honest though, whenever I see a smoking hot chick and she is under 35 I am still messaging them but I am not sending the same kind of message. For the women that are 35 and older, I am sending them a very serious message because I treat each one like it could be the start of a new relationship whereas the messages I send to the younger girls are far more playful and sexy. I expect to hear back from some of them soon.

Welcome back everyone, sorry it has been a few weeks since my last post but I have been very busy with family and work etc. I have seen Kilana twice since my last entry and both times we made out but I never had sex with her. I am not sure what girl wants from me but I am cool with taking things slow. I have another date with her on Friday, but this time I am going to have her over to my place to watch a movie and I think this time I will try and have sex with her. If she is not into it, if she declines having sex with me, I doubt I will ever talk to her again. That may sound shallow or whatever but I don't care. I need to worry about me, I need to spend time with people that make me happy. Isn't that why people say happy new year? Isn't being happy the whole point here?

My new years ever and christmas was not bad. I have never been a big fan of holidays and all the consumerism and bullshit but it WAS nice to spend some time with my family. At my age we don't really exchange gifts anymore but my sister did buy me a huge bottle of Grey Goose because she knows it is my favorite. I didn't get anything for her and I think she is pissed now so now I feel obligated to go buy her something but I still don't know what to get her. This is the crap I am talking about. Why should I feel obligated. Is that really what Jesus being born was all about? I doubt it.

I have been meeting a lot of younger women lately. I guess I should call them girls because they aren't really women. They are young girls and almost all of them are very immature. I have a hard time tolerating immaturity, I am not sure why but it is a big turn off for me. These young girls I have been meeting are very different from the older women I meet. The older women I meet want to talk about profound important stuff and the young girls I meet just want to talk to about their favorite tv shows, facebook, and going to clubs etc. They also like to chat on webcam all the time and they like to expose themselves and get all sexual etc. I really don't know what to make of this kind of behavior. I AM still talking to a bunch of them and I don't mind meeting them and having sex with them but I doubt any of them will turn out to be relationship material.

This morning I made eggs and bacon and toast but I forgot the bacon on the counter and by the time I ate the eggs, I no longer felt like eating the bacon so I went outside and threw it on the street. I am hoping that some birds or stray dogs will find it and eat it.

On Saturday night I took Kilana to the movies. Yes I know it is very gay and cliched that I took her to the movies. I saw quite a few couples there in fact I have a funny story about that. I forgot how busy the movie theaters get on a Saturday night. We bought our tickets for the 7:30pm showing around 7pm and then we immediately had to go wait in a long ass line. We were sort of just standing there awkwardly and there was a couple who were like 3-4 people in front of us in line and they were very public about their affection, hugging and kissing other the entire time. We were both like ooook this is lawl. I tried to play it cool and ignore them and try and shift the conversation to the weather and to politics. We talked about the Obama administration and how things were getting chilly in Austin at night and we were both commenting on how we were happy and grateful that we weren't on the east coast right now where they are getting hammered with cold weather and snow. Of course she spent most of her life growing up in Hawaii which is why she moved to Texas in the first place. She knew that she could never handle the cold. I grew up in New Jersey and I left there because I hated the cold. Between something and nothing as we used to say. Anyways it has been a long time, maybe 10 years, since I last went to the movies. I can't believe how many damn commercials there are BEFORE they actually play the trailers for upcoming movies. Also I don't remember the theater being so fricking loud, I felt like I was gonna go deaf. The movie we went to see was called Twilight The New Moon starring Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, and Taylor Lautner. I had not seen the first Twilight movie but I read the coles notes on it from a website so I had a pretty good idea of what would be happening. I have to saw I thought it wasn't bad and it deserved a higher rating then what I read online. She said she liked it too and she said that she had seen the first Twilight already and I was like oh I had no idea and she was like ya. After the movie we walked around downtown Austin for a while sipping on some coffees. We stopped somewhere in some park somewhere, sorry I don't recall exactly where it was and we sat on a bench and talked. We were both turned sideways and the light was shining on her face. At one point her hair had kind of blown in front of her face and I reached up and moved it out of the way and then sort of stopped and realized what I had done. She paused for a moment then leaned forward and kissed me. I usually am not into making out in public but we locked lips there for what seemed like 5 minutes. When we were done, I felt embarrassed and got up and told her let's go. She thought it was cute that I was embarrassed and well what could I do. We took a taxi back to her place and she invited me up for a drink. We sat on her couch in her 1 bedroom condo and she explained to me over drinks that she wanted to tread very cautiously because she had her heart broken 2 years ago and still hadn't fully recovered from that experience. She told me she didn't even want to get involved with me and was regretting going out with me in the first place because she said now that she really liked me and could see us maybe taking this somewhere. I was kind of confused but I was flattered at the same time. We made out a bit and then I told her I think I should be heading home to show her I wasn't interested in just getting into her pants. I headed home and happily watched the latest episode of Heroes. Geez I can't wait until my favorite show called "Breaking Bad" comes back on. I think they said they would have a new season in the new year.

Good news. No swine flu. I am back to 100% now. I talked to Kilana and I am going to get together with her this Saturday night, still deciding where exactly I am going to take her. Do people still go to movies? Seems kinda lame and gay and also it's kind of antisocial to just beside someone and watch a screen. Tomorrow I am going back to work finally after being sick for so many days and I hope I have some good news waiting for me. I sense there is some serious corporate shifting going on right now and I hope nothing bad happens to my division. I am working on some pretty big deals right now.

I met a new girl online named Roberta and she is 46 years old. Yes that is right she is OLDER than me AND her name is Roberta but don't jump to negative conclusions so quickly my friends. She is smoking hot and she is from Portugal. She only moved here about 4 years ago and her english is horrible, but she has big hooters and they are real. Yes that's right I mentioned her large titties right away because um well they are huge. She is a lean woman, not much fat, kinda petite but she has absolutely massive breasts and they are real. I can only imagine how other dudes are going to react when I go out in public with her. I wonder if I could ever get serious with a girl like this. I don't know if I could handle other guys mindlessly staring at my girl's tits all the time. I guess this is just my insecurity talking plus I stare at other women's titties all the time myself anyways.

So far I have chatted with her online on webcam and also over the phone but it is difficult to understand what she is saying sometimes on the phone because her accent is so thick. She seems like a nice girl. She seems like a very open person. She isn't sarcastic at all and I really like that. I think that north america has become poisoned by sarcasm. I also believe the primary cause for this situation is Seinfeld. Seinfeld was the birth of sarcasm in my opinion and I believe that that show negatively affected the entire north american population. A show about nothing. Pffft.

Hello everyone, here is the update on Kilana the Hawaiin girl I went out with. She didn't remember a whole lot so it is a good thing I didn't bang her. She does remember a good deal of what happened and said that she was really attracted to me and that we should get together again sometime soon. I guess this means I don't have to take her out for dinner again lol I can just have her over and watch a movie and bang the shit out of her Not much other to report other than that - been sorta bed ridden after the other night. I have had what's felt like a 72 hour hangover :S I hope I don't have swine flu or something.

I am so sorry to my readers that I haven't posted anything in 2 weeks. I have just been so busy with work and life and dating etc. I didn't realize I would meet so many women online once I joined the dating site. So I will try and do my best to get you all caught up on things. I am working on a major client at work. If I get this deal then I can relax for the rest of the year it is so big.

So I went out with Kilana the Hawaiin receptionist at a law firm. I decided to take her out to Benihana Japanese Steakhouse rather than take her somewhere super expensive the first time around. I did this on purpose for a couple of reasons. First of all I am getting sick of taking girls out and spending a fortune on them only to end up with no action at the end of the night or to never hear from them again. Also I want to be able to start slowly with this girl so the next time I take her out I can take her to a really fancy place rather than show her all my cards the first time.

The place was ok, we had some steaks and some sushi and I pretty much ate too much while I was there because I was happy the prices were lower than what I was used to. She said she had moved to Austin from Hawaii about 4 years ago because she had secured her job at the law firm through a series of online remote interviews. She said she was pretty cautious when it comes to meeting guys because she was married before to an abusive husband who physically beat her up and I was like ah that could be an issue. I was thinking does this girl have too much baggage cuz I have never been out with a girl who was physically abused.

I didn't drink too much and I was starting to feel pretty sleepy but I could tell from the way she was squirming in her seat that she didn't want the night to end just yet so I ordered 4 shots of Jaeger and 2 cups of coffee and tried to wake up and think about where I could take her next. So I went on to my iphone and looked around at some hot spots I could take her to.

I took her to this cheap place called "Spill Bar" on sixth. They have lots of cheap drink specials and a high energy vibe to the place. I didn't want to take her to a fancy dark lounge because we would just fall asleep and the jaeger shots were starting to kick in. The place was jumping, busy as hell, luckily I am a baller and just greased the doorman $20 to skip the lineup. The place was shoulder to shoulder with people and I could have sworn someone grabbed my ass as I was walking through the place to the bar... hopefully it was a female lol and not some random gay dude. There was no place to sit down so we just stood near the bar drinking beers, doing shots, and eventually she dragged me on to the dance floor. I am not much of a dancer but once I get drunk enough, I am willing to put in the effort and commit to the dancing even though I might look like a dork. There were lots of hot young girls around me and a couple of them were eyeing me and even grinding up on me and that made Kilana jealous which I had a lot of fun with. A little jealousy goes a long way.

I was really plastered by the time the bar closed and they turned on all the lights. I was feeling queezy like I was gonna hurl chunks, so quickly got out of there and nearly got hit by a taxi trying to get a ride home. Somehow we ended up finding a taxi and piling into it. I just sat in the back seat with my head leaned back and she sat beside me sort of cuddling up next to me. We kissed a few times in the back seat but I was in no condition to take this girl to bed - I had drank too much, so I figured if she DID want to sleep with me, it could only be a good thing to turn her down cuz that will just make her want me more and I can bang her another time when I can actually feel my body parts. Being numb sucks. So I told her I wasn't up for much more and that we should get together another time. She hopped out at her place after a few more kisses in front of her place and then the taxi driver took me home. Woke up the next morning with my clothes on face first on my bed. Ughhh.

What a crazy week. First of all, Rebecca did decide to talk to me after our date and the random hurling session I had in the taxi. She agreed to go out with me this coming Friday, so that's good. I had to travel most of the week on sales calls. I mainly work out of my office and do inside sales on the phone, but I had some major clients to visit in Dallas and also in Houston. Lots of driving, and lots of blah blah sales and marketing bs. I can't believe some of the stupid conversations I ended up being forced to take part in while we were out with clients at restaurants etc.

The other sales guy I traveled with is really irritating. We have nothing in coming and the guy is a total geek. He also is married to some woman that he can't stand so all he did was bitch about his wife and kids and flirt with every girl that he saw. It was pretty embarrassing as I watched him get shut down time and time again. But at least it made me feel better about my personal life and I certainly got a little more insight into what turns people off.... lol what NOT to do.

Felix almost caught a squirrel the other day and I was kind of worried he might get hurt. People always say having a dog is a great way to meet women etc but I have never had any luck out walking Felix. I HAVE met some women who have dogs walking, don't get me wrong... but none of them were of any quality. They were either way too hot and young, or they looked like their dog was the only companion she had.

I had my choice of 5 different girls to take out on the weekend. It was the most fun I have had in years... looking at their pictures, rereading their emails twenty times over! So I decided to take out Samantha who is a student at the University of Texas... yeah I know, young girls are not my thing, but this girl is very very very good looking and she comes across very mature. I also chose to take out Kilana who is a Hawaiin woman that is 32. She is a receptionist at a high end law firm and looks veryyyyyy sexy in squashed square rimmed glasses I will tell you about the date with Samantha now, and tomorrow I will talk about Kilana.

I decided to take her to Kenichi Austin which is a high end Asian cuisine type of place:



They are renowned for their Asian food and their sushi. I decided to get a 14oz Ribeye Steak just because I wasn't in the mood for asian food. Crap Felix is throwing up, I will be back to finish this later. Ok I am back. She had some sushi and she said it was really tasty. When we were done dinner I asked her if she wanted to go out for some drinks at a lounge or something but she said she was tired and she had to get up early in the morning for classes. I am not really sure if I struck out or not. When I dropped her off we shook hands... you do the math :/

Last night I went out with Rebecca the dermatologist. I decided not to take her to Fleming's because she is not big on steak etc... instead we went to Roy's Austin Hawaiian Fusion on 2nd Street. I picked her up in my car because I didn't plan on having lots of drinks and figured I would still be able to drive by the end of the night. I had seen pictures of her online, but most of the pictures were dark and in a crowd of people etc. When she walked out the of lobby of her condo I nearly had a heart attack at how hot she was and how well dressed she was and yeah of course she had perfect skin. She climbed in and introduced herself and we shook hands. She had some grip to her handshake so I was happy about that... I hate girls who have dead fish handshakes. The smell of her perfume was very strong but very nice. I had a hard time focusing on what she was saying because I was very excited and very nervous. She is probably the hottest girl I have ever been out with in my life... and she is smart and whitty and intelligent. She noticed Felix's dog leash and mentioned that she herself has a Maltese and that the 4 of us should go for a walk sometime.

We arrive at Roy's, park, go inside, get a nice table, sit down and order drinks. I ordered a light beer because I was driving and she ordered a glass of Chardonnay from Australia. She said she was 36 but she looked older, and not in a bad way. She just looked very womanly with long brown hair, obviously straightened. She said she was half Irish and half American but she never spent any time in Ireland and she didn't have an accent. The waiter brought us the menus and I really had no idea what to order, so I told her, just order some things and we will split it all. Again, I had a hard time of focusing on doing anything because I was fixated by her presence. I was thinking to myself at some point, there is no way you are going to get anywhere with this girl if you keep exuding this energy. You need to chill out and act as if she is nothing special, otherwise she will smell my desperation and realize how enamored I am by her.

I still have no idea what I ate... the only thing I remember was some of it was fruity and some of it was spicy and there was some kind of meat in there lol. She was talking about her various accomplishments etc and I was starting again to feel overwhelmed so I ordered a Black Russian to calm my nerves. This triggered something in her because she said lets get some shots! I was like wow shots ok... that was out of left field, perhaps I incorrectly judged this girl, maybe she isn't as responsible, and classy as I think. She was so good looking though, I decided to ignore my instincts and go with the flow. 1 shot turned into 2, and 2 turned into 3. Then I switched to double black russians. SO at his point we paid the bill and decided to head over to a lounge to keep the night rolling. I had to leave my car at the restaurant because I had drank too much so we took a taxi over to QUA Bottle Lounge on West Fourth Street which is a new upscale cocktail lounge.

We had some more drinks there and she was getting very flirty and was touching my hands a lot. I was really happy and excited but I was too bombed out of my mind to enjoy it. Eventually we left there and took a taxi back to her place. On the way there, I was all excited like a schoolgirl at the prospect of spending the night with this girl. We got about 3 blocks from her house when all of a sudden I got a sudden rush of heat and felt like I was gonna hurl. I told the taxi driver to pull over and I opened the door and spewed chunks everywhere. When I was done, I was sweating, and dizzy... I told her we better just call it a night and just gave me a kiss on the cheek and left. I'm pretty sure I ruined things and she won't be talking to me again.

I took Felix to the vet today at South Lamar Animal Hospital and they were great. I got him some pills and they said he should be ok in a few days. I stopped at Mister Tramps on the way home and grabbed a burger and fries while Felix slept in the car. The waitress was very attractive and she mentioned she was going to University of Austin. I asked her how she was enjoying school and I didn't get much of an intelligent response. She was wearing black tight pants and that was quite distracting She told me she was into yoga and now I think I need to meet a yoga girl. Perhaps I can find someone that LOOKS like her, but who actually has a brain heh. She told me I should check out Bodhi Yoga down on San Gabriel Street, so I decided to pop in and take a look. The floors were all made of bamboo and they had a very serene setup. I took a peek at the classes and I noticed a lot of fit and fine women, and also it looked like some seriously hard exercises lol. I better start working out and stretching a bit before I actually start coming here. I took a flyer from a petite blonde girl named Jessica and was on my way. Felix was getting pissed off and at all the time in the car so I took him over to Zilker Park on Barton Springs Road for a nice run. Ever since I have become single, I realized I have a lot of time and money on my hands since I don't have to pay for a family anymore. I have a date tomorrow night with a girl named Rebecca who is a dermatologist, I hope this doesn't mean she will be staring at my less than perfect skin all night :s Anyways I think I am going to take her to Fleming's Prime Steakhouse and Wine Bar for some beef tenderloin. I have never been there before, I never really went to nice restaurants before I was single and man was I missing out. So I will let you all know how it goes of course. I hope she doesn't want to go somewhere after like 219West or Aces Lounge :/ I think I need to learn how to dance etc so I can keep up with these younger girls who like to dance at clubs and lounges. Well I am going to North by Northwest Brewery tomorrow for lunch. I wish I could tell you that this lunch was with a mysterious single lady, but no it is with 5 other associates I work with. Hopefully there will be some attractive waitresses around to keep me from going insane at this midday sausagefest

Well Felix isn't feeling too well today, but I sure as hell am I have more dates lined up next week and last night I didn't get to sleep until 3am thanks to a hot blonde girl who is a Judo instructor. Finally a girl I can chat with online who doesn't want to get naked right away or have "cyber" sheesh. I was so tired at work today and I had to sit through a two hour sales meeting during which I swear I nodded off and was snoring because I don't really remember the last 30 minutes. The meeting was boring, something about synergy blah blah... jk... man I hate the word synergy... anyways as I was saying I have more dates lined up for next week - I think I might have found some wholesome girls finally.

Can one find life after love? I didn't think I would ever be able to again. At age 43, my wife left me and took our 2 children. For the last 2 years I have been moping around my house with my no one but my Spaniel named Felix to keep me company. Sure I have friends who have tried to hook me up with people etc but it all just seems forced. I have decided to turn over a new life and go FIND some happiness for myself again. I am done with feeling sad, and ready for some adventure. I stumbled onto an internet dating site 2 months ago and my life has changed for the better in almost every way. There are a lot of girls/women out there who are just looking for a good time, looking to get crazy on webcams etc but that is not what I am looking for. It seems like every girl I meet online turns out to be freaky... but I am determined to find love. Inspired by a friend's notion of writing a book, I decided to make a blog and document my attempt at finding a classy, intelligent, down to earth girl online. So far I have met nothing but floozies and freaky girls who are into all kinds of odd things. It seems like sex is the only thing on these girls minds these days. Is it so hard to believe that there are some guys out there who want more than sex? I've been living in Austin most of my life, went to University of Austin, and I've been working for a major telecom here for the last 9 years. I have a date with a redhead single mom on Saturday, we shall see how that goes.